I Experienced, I Realized, I Learnt..

Couple of days back, I had to lecture one of my best friends who lost his very good friend. I told him that I’ll write him a nice mail, telling them about some very important aspects of friendship. Just the next morning I had to give a similar lecture to another friend of mine. Then I thought may be every individual of my age would need these few tips. I chose to write down a blog on it.

When I was in school, I retained 90% of my friends till the end of my school days. Even today I am in contact with many of old school friends. We managed to hold our friendship for more than 10 long years, even when we were miles apart. When I came out of school and entered college, it was the biggest change! The kind of friends I have made now are just so different than the school-time friends. Half of my college friends are just for the name-sake. They just are a part of my orkut/ facebook’s friend’s list. On one side you are talking to a 10 year old friend of yours and on other you are making and breaking friends in 10 days straight! This thing becomes quite indigestible.

Anyway, coming to the point, I have plotted down a few things that I have learnt in the past few months. This article is dedicated to all my friends of my age-group. :) Its only them who need it.

1. Always give ample of time to nurture a friendship. Sometimes, it happens that you are very impressed by a particular friend of yours. So much so that you will chat with him/her the whole day through msgs/ calls/ internet. You become very close friends, may be BEST friends. You reach the peek of your friendship. But then a stage comes, where the elastic is pulled too much. So much that it cannot bear the strain and it breaks off! Don’t get too hyper about anyone. Its very rare that you become close friends in a small span of time, even if you become not necessary that the friendship would last. Because closeness develops over a long period of time.Why do you think are childhood friends whom you don’t meet daily are more closer than those whom you do meet regularly? Just as slow and steady wins the race, a friendsip nurtured slowly and steadily lasts the longest!
2. Appearances are deceptive! Never ever trust somebody just because he/she looks well-behaved, well-mannered, just because he/she belongs to a good family. In this world of advanced science, even a crow can look as beautiful as a swan. Though, the reality behind the beauty is very ugly!
3. Never go by anyone’s words. People utter every possible sweet word to delight you. Gone are the days when people spoke what they actually felt. Today people speak what pleases others. Making promises was meaningful only when we were small. Today promises are just a stack of words said with proper emotions to put a psychological effect on the listener. Actions are the only thing you can trust on.
4. There comes a time when your very close friend is no more the same. There could be multiple reasons behind it. At such time, if you are really deeply bonded with that person it becomes very difficult to believe that your friend is no more the same. Remember one thing, nothing in life is constant except change. People do change! The only thing we can do is, accept the fact and move on.
5. Never be so glued or so close to somebody that his/her absence drives you crazy. There are very few, very very few people who’ll be there with you always. Attachment to someone, do give a lot of happiness. That closeness with your friend would make you very happy. But that happiness is temporary. And if you still choose to be bonded with that person, then make yourself ready to face a situation when he/she is not with you.
6. One very important aspect is giving space to your friend. Never think that you are the world to anybody. NO! There might be people who are more important to your friend than you are!
7. Last but never the least, TRUST is the thing that forms the base of any friendship. And this base is formed mutually. If you demand for it, you have to give it too. And once broken, broken forever! Either trust somebody completely or don’t trust at all. Partial trust is the thing that creates most number of misunderstandings.

I think that’s all I have to share with all my friends. I just felt that at some point may be you’ll need it. And as a ‘friend’ I just thought to convey my thoughts to you all… :)